Finding the "new normal"

     I have only lived in this house for a little over a year. I have never been this old before. I am still trying to figure out what it means to have both parents gone as well as a son. For most of this life I have not dealt with arthritis in my back or in my hands and feet to the point that I sometimes cannot bend my fingers and my feet hurt. I have spent hours walking and walking but now it seems to irritate the arthritis in my back causing me to limp after awhile. Hence, I am not walking much anymore. I do sincerely want to continue to be able to move and do things so I need to find new and different ways to move my body regularly so I don't stiffen up. I fully expect to live another decade or more and wonder what I'm going to do with my time. I firmly believe that I can choose to do whatever I might want to do but I just don't know what that is. Eating is no longer a great pleasure as I deal with burning mouth syndrome that pretty much destroys my ability to taste and acid reflux. Despite taking my daily prescription for GERD, after-affects of eating are unpleasant so I just don't enjoy the process. I have always loved and looked forward to traveling but now there are problems inherent with how to cope with where the nearest bathroom is, issues of sleeping, remembering, finding my way around, etc. The people who have been so important in my life (and still are) seem to be so busy and far away but I realize that's what it was like for my parents and absolutely everyone who reaches a "certain age". I have been mostly happy throughout my life but I'm finding my zest is drying up a bit. It's not that I feel pessimistic or have any kind of animosity toward anyone. I just feel resigned to simply enduring. I want to be helpful but I can't do that in any way I have in the past. I don't feel like I have much to offer. I'm just trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life...........