Balance

     Today as we discussed in church the attributes of our Father in Heaven and pondered how to go about becoming like Him, as we are commanded to do, the foremost thought I had was to pray for wisdom to know limits and boundaries. I'm not really worried about temptations to be some kind of evil person, but I do often wonder when to help others and when to stay back and encourage them to fight their battles. I also want to know how to see myself clearly enough to know what aspects to keep and what I need to change. It's hard to look at ourselves truly objectively. All human beings are constrained by their own experience and knowledge in developing perspective on everything. I can't see things as a young boy in Bolivia would see things because his life experiences are very different from mine. I can't understand what a microbiologist would understand because he/she has very different knowledge from what I have. In the same way, I can only see in myself what I can see. I am where I am from a lifetime of making my own choices from my own perspective. At times I have wondered if I could be a "fly on the wall" to hear a conversation about me, what would I hear? What positive or negative things would be shared? How much weight would I give to them? If I feel someone is narrow in their awareness or tending toward unpleasant characteristics, I wouldn't be as concerned about their opinion of me as I would that of someone I love and respect.
     I know God loves me- not just in the scripture-based general sense. I have had my own personal message, more than once, that He loves me. I'm not so worried about whether or how much God loves me. I worry a little about "pleasing" Him but not because I fear being punished. I know He is just and wise and I want to be like He is. As I try to self-analyze, I want to appreciate in myself whatever worthy characteristics I have managed to develop. I also want to recognize anything that is an obstacle to my being like God and my Savior. I am grateful that I have eternity to learn and grow. It's going to take that long but I'm on the right path.