It has been quite awhile since I took the time to compose a blogspot. I don't even know if anyone is reading it anymore. But I have been thinking about something so I thought I would verbalize my thoughts.
I love giving gifts. I think most people do. Some people are really good at managing to give the "perfect gift" to someone without being told what to get. I try to log into my brain an idea for a gift when someone happens to mention it. I'm always afraid I'm going to spend the money and the time acquiring something that won't be wanted. Then the recipient feels obligated to thank me and try to figure out what to do with a gift they don't really want.
I have sometimes heard a similar thing in reference to food. "I'm going to ____, do you want something?" Sure. "What do you want?" Oh, I don't know....surprise me. Oooh that can be a loaded request. Is it really going to work to guess what someone feels in the mood for?
Actually, I think the real issue is that, we don't need anything. Most gifts are unnecessary extravagances, not like the orange in the stocking on Christmas morning during the Depression. Does any child really need the latest electronic whiz-thingy? I know I don't really need a blizzard from Dairy Queen. If I were really hungry, I would probably have no problem requesting something, although I would be very happy to eat just about anything.
A similar thing can happen in our relationship with our Heavenly Father. We want Him to "surprise" us with something that will light up our life. We just don't know what that might be. Granted, He knows so much more than any of us. He may even be "surprising" us on a regular basis with blessings we don't recognize because we just think it's a happy coincidence or maybe we just have no idea how it might have turned out without His watchful care. I am, indeed, trying to be "perfect even as Father in heaven is perfect", but I have a very long way to go. I'm glad I don't yet have the power to grant or refuse prayers because I don't have the wisdom to know the best way to respond.
Friday, June 17, 2011
Friday, May 27, 2011
Guidance?
I see many opportunities for learning in every day occurrences. I hope I'm gaining wisdom through all my observations. I was thinking about how we ask for things- from other people or God- with the hope and even expectation that we'll get them. I'm not talking about wrapped gifts or money or even major miracles. For instance, my mother has developped the idea that when she stands (which isn't very often), she wants whoever is helping her to "move her feet" for her. It doesn't work very well. I'm not sure if her feet frozen in place is due to fear or muscle inability, or maybe a combination. She is disappointed when someone else cannot make her feet move. Since I cannot actually put myself into her place, I cannot truly determine how hard she is trying. From the outside, it doesn't appear that she's trying at all. I am willing to "guide" her footsteps but I cannot take the steps for her.
I wonder how often I have asked God to "guide" me when I was really hoping he would put me in a position where I basically had only one choice so I was somewhat forced into movement. Have I taken the time, made the effort to truly "study it out in my mind" before expecting results? Am I just waiting for someone, even God, to do something when I should be making more effort on my own? Do I expect other people to do more than meet me halfway? Am I afraid, of failure, rejection, ridicule, or hurt to the point that I hesitate in doing things that I should do and maybe want to do? Am I more comfortable where I am so I just sit and wait- wait for a decision to be made for me, an incident to occur around me, so I don't have to take as much responsibility for the outcome?
Just wondering...........................
I wonder how often I have asked God to "guide" me when I was really hoping he would put me in a position where I basically had only one choice so I was somewhat forced into movement. Have I taken the time, made the effort to truly "study it out in my mind" before expecting results? Am I just waiting for someone, even God, to do something when I should be making more effort on my own? Do I expect other people to do more than meet me halfway? Am I afraid, of failure, rejection, ridicule, or hurt to the point that I hesitate in doing things that I should do and maybe want to do? Am I more comfortable where I am so I just sit and wait- wait for a decision to be made for me, an incident to occur around me, so I don't have to take as much responsibility for the outcome?
Just wondering...........................
Monday, May 23, 2011
What are blessings?
It seems nearly every day there is someone in the news falling from a "high" place- a politician, banker, movie/sports/music star. They seem to "have it all" but apparently it isn't enough. They have to cheat on their spouse, be dishonest, cheat to win, or anything to get even more- more attention, more money, more of everything.
When my children were young, buying them something was in their eyes a way to express love and approval. As they got older, the amount of money needed to "prove" how much they were "loved" continued to increase.
As adults, we often equate fame and fortune with success and approval- from other people and from God. We idolize people who have several houses all over the world. We are willing to listen to the opinions and advice of someone who is famous (for ANY reason) on any topic however unrelated it may be to that person's training or expertise, simply because they have so much. We often refer to someone who is lucky as receiving many "blessings" from God.
God doesn't prove His love by giving anyone good looks, riches, talents, or worldly success. As a matter of fact, He warns us over and over again about "laying up treasures where moth and rust doth corrupt". All of those things are not blessings, but they are not curses either- necessarily. What they are is whatever we decide to make of them.
-If we use wealth to hoard belongings from jewels to cars to houses, the wealth becomes a curse. We end up having to use all our efforts to protect and maintain those things. They become our "gods" because they are the object of our attention and efforts. If we use wealth to benefit others, not in a way to receive attention, but in a sincere desire to help, the wealth can be a blessing, to others and ourselves. That doesn't necessarily mean we have to give away every penny and live as homeless paupers. We can use money to provide necessities for our loved ones so they are not a burden to anyone else. We can use money to acquire an education and increase our talents.
-If we use our talents to gain the attention of people so we can revel in the applause, those talents become a curse. We increase in pride and self-centeredness. If we use our talents to provide for our loved ones and to gain ways to influence the world in good ways, the talents can be a blessing.
-Even a healthy body can be a curse if we spend excessive time and attention on exercise to "sculpt" our beautiful body. We can spend money on cosmetic surgery, make-up, tattoos, clothing, tanning booths.......... Our body becomes an object of worship. But if we do all we can to serve others and ensure we continue to be healthy by avoiding any kind of overindulgence, then our body can be a blessing.
We would do well to imagine our own funeral. How would our epitath be worded? How would people feel about our departure? How would they remember our example, how we lived our life? Now would be a good time to decide whether we will make our life a blessing or a curse, to ourselves and the world in general.
When my children were young, buying them something was in their eyes a way to express love and approval. As they got older, the amount of money needed to "prove" how much they were "loved" continued to increase.
As adults, we often equate fame and fortune with success and approval- from other people and from God. We idolize people who have several houses all over the world. We are willing to listen to the opinions and advice of someone who is famous (for ANY reason) on any topic however unrelated it may be to that person's training or expertise, simply because they have so much. We often refer to someone who is lucky as receiving many "blessings" from God.
God doesn't prove His love by giving anyone good looks, riches, talents, or worldly success. As a matter of fact, He warns us over and over again about "laying up treasures where moth and rust doth corrupt". All of those things are not blessings, but they are not curses either- necessarily. What they are is whatever we decide to make of them.
-If we use wealth to hoard belongings from jewels to cars to houses, the wealth becomes a curse. We end up having to use all our efforts to protect and maintain those things. They become our "gods" because they are the object of our attention and efforts. If we use wealth to benefit others, not in a way to receive attention, but in a sincere desire to help, the wealth can be a blessing, to others and ourselves. That doesn't necessarily mean we have to give away every penny and live as homeless paupers. We can use money to provide necessities for our loved ones so they are not a burden to anyone else. We can use money to acquire an education and increase our talents.
-If we use our talents to gain the attention of people so we can revel in the applause, those talents become a curse. We increase in pride and self-centeredness. If we use our talents to provide for our loved ones and to gain ways to influence the world in good ways, the talents can be a blessing.
-Even a healthy body can be a curse if we spend excessive time and attention on exercise to "sculpt" our beautiful body. We can spend money on cosmetic surgery, make-up, tattoos, clothing, tanning booths.......... Our body becomes an object of worship. But if we do all we can to serve others and ensure we continue to be healthy by avoiding any kind of overindulgence, then our body can be a blessing.
We would do well to imagine our own funeral. How would our epitath be worded? How would people feel about our departure? How would they remember our example, how we lived our life? Now would be a good time to decide whether we will make our life a blessing or a curse, to ourselves and the world in general.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Being who I really am
I wrote a song a few years ago entitled "Blind to the Blessings". The gist of the words is that we have so many good things in our life yet we tend to focus on what we wish we had. Madison Avenue has done well in their efforts to figure out how to attract consumers. I think of the way most children are on Christmas morning or their birthdays when they have piles of gifts. They rip through all the wrappings then look up asking, "Is that all?"
This morning I read to Mom out of the book of Revelations in the New Testament. There were warnings about "Babylon", which is basically a symbol of the wealth and desires of the world. Too many people think of all the things John listed, e.g. gold, silver, precious stones, pearls, fine linen, purple, silk, scarlet, all manner vessels of ivory, vessels of most precious wood, and of brass, and iron, and marble, and cinnamon, and odours, and ointments, and frankincense, and wine, and oil, and fine flour, and wheat, and beasts, and sheep, and horses, and chariots, and slaves, and souls of men (whew- that about covers it!), anyway, people think of these things as their highest priority. You need money to make money. Money buys you anything. The one who dies with the most toys wins. People justify breaking God's commandments every day, mostly for satisfying their "lusts".
I have been really impressed by some of the people who have been interviewed in disaster areas lately. They are standing in the rubble that was their home, or in a shelter out of the flood, and they say something like, "We still have each other. All the rest is just 'things' and they can be replaced." I don't know whether they were being insincere because they were on camera and thought that was an impressive thing to say. It's always easy to say good things when we think we have an audience. Integrity is genuinely believing what you say and being who you are no matter who is watching or listening, or if you're alone.
Over the span of my life, I have had occasions to look at myself and analyze who I really am. Usually it takes a pretty traumatic event to cause us to show our true colors. When we're stressed or tired, we don't do such a good job hiding our feelings. Ironically, people sometimes justify drugs or alcohol on the grounds that it helps them "relax" so they can feel comfortable. So who do they think they REALLY are? Are you kind, patient, understanding, helpful? Or are you afraid of others' opinions, self-loathing, lazy, angry?
When I became a mother, I realized that I had to be the "grown up". I had always had a little fear of the dark- unknown things and places. I was afraid of storms and house fires. I had to look at myself and decide whether I wanted to embrace those fears, or overcome them so I could help my children to overcome their fears.
When my son died a couple years ago, I had to decide whether I truly believed that I would see him again and be able to spend time with him. Was my faith just something I displayed to impress others or was it real? If it wasn't real, it certainly wasn't going to provide much comfort.
When we were forced into bankruptcy, I had to analyze whether I could forgive others as I would want to be forgiven. I had to decide if my pride was more important to me than humility and hope.
Solomon (he is thought to be the author) appropriately said, "Vanity, Vanity, all is vanity." The title of a play is also true, "You Can't Take it With You". Another scripture says, "What man by thought can add to his stature?" (meaning, what can we really change even about our own appearance?)
I believe people can change. When I'm discouraged I sometimes question it. But if I couldn't believe people could change, what hope would there be for the world? We teach our children to share because we don't want them to always be greedy. We teach our children to help others because we don't want them to always be self-centered. We encourage our teenagers to avoid gossip and evil speaking of others because we don't want them to hurt people. We believe they can improve. We don't ever get done improving, or at least we shouldn't stop improving. How do we react to the slob with the big belly who scolds his wife about her appearance? How do we feel when we see someone budge ahead in a line then glare at someone else who does the same thing further ahead?
Gold, silver, beasts, and linens don't matter. They won't last and they don't signify anything meaningful about us. What matters is how we make others feel by the way we treat them. What matters is the example we set, avoiding hypocrisy. We aren't done improving..... ever!
This morning I read to Mom out of the book of Revelations in the New Testament. There were warnings about "Babylon", which is basically a symbol of the wealth and desires of the world. Too many people think of all the things John listed, e.g. gold, silver, precious stones, pearls, fine linen, purple, silk, scarlet, all manner vessels of ivory, vessels of most precious wood, and of brass, and iron, and marble, and cinnamon, and odours, and ointments, and frankincense, and wine, and oil, and fine flour, and wheat, and beasts, and sheep, and horses, and chariots, and slaves, and souls of men (whew- that about covers it!), anyway, people think of these things as their highest priority. You need money to make money. Money buys you anything. The one who dies with the most toys wins. People justify breaking God's commandments every day, mostly for satisfying their "lusts".
I have been really impressed by some of the people who have been interviewed in disaster areas lately. They are standing in the rubble that was their home, or in a shelter out of the flood, and they say something like, "We still have each other. All the rest is just 'things' and they can be replaced." I don't know whether they were being insincere because they were on camera and thought that was an impressive thing to say. It's always easy to say good things when we think we have an audience. Integrity is genuinely believing what you say and being who you are no matter who is watching or listening, or if you're alone.
Over the span of my life, I have had occasions to look at myself and analyze who I really am. Usually it takes a pretty traumatic event to cause us to show our true colors. When we're stressed or tired, we don't do such a good job hiding our feelings. Ironically, people sometimes justify drugs or alcohol on the grounds that it helps them "relax" so they can feel comfortable. So who do they think they REALLY are? Are you kind, patient, understanding, helpful? Or are you afraid of others' opinions, self-loathing, lazy, angry?
When I became a mother, I realized that I had to be the "grown up". I had always had a little fear of the dark- unknown things and places. I was afraid of storms and house fires. I had to look at myself and decide whether I wanted to embrace those fears, or overcome them so I could help my children to overcome their fears.
When my son died a couple years ago, I had to decide whether I truly believed that I would see him again and be able to spend time with him. Was my faith just something I displayed to impress others or was it real? If it wasn't real, it certainly wasn't going to provide much comfort.
When we were forced into bankruptcy, I had to analyze whether I could forgive others as I would want to be forgiven. I had to decide if my pride was more important to me than humility and hope.
Solomon (he is thought to be the author) appropriately said, "Vanity, Vanity, all is vanity." The title of a play is also true, "You Can't Take it With You". Another scripture says, "What man by thought can add to his stature?" (meaning, what can we really change even about our own appearance?)
I believe people can change. When I'm discouraged I sometimes question it. But if I couldn't believe people could change, what hope would there be for the world? We teach our children to share because we don't want them to always be greedy. We teach our children to help others because we don't want them to always be self-centered. We encourage our teenagers to avoid gossip and evil speaking of others because we don't want them to hurt people. We believe they can improve. We don't ever get done improving, or at least we shouldn't stop improving. How do we react to the slob with the big belly who scolds his wife about her appearance? How do we feel when we see someone budge ahead in a line then glare at someone else who does the same thing further ahead?
Gold, silver, beasts, and linens don't matter. They won't last and they don't signify anything meaningful about us. What matters is how we make others feel by the way we treat them. What matters is the example we set, avoiding hypocrisy. We aren't done improving..... ever!
Monday, May 09, 2011
Mother's Day
Every Sunday , we wheel my mother home for church then to spend the day with us at home. Yesterday was Mother's Day and Mom spent the day at "her original home", as usual. (We have to call the care center her home now because she really would prefer being at this home but there just isn't any way we can manage it. She is very weak and heavy- like trying to deal with a 200 pound newborn. Since she has nothing major wrong with her, she may live for many years yet.) Happily, my niece, Cindy Nash, joined us for the afternoon. After a pleasant lunch, we spent the rest of the afternoon in front of the tv. But we weren't watching a show or movie. We were spending time with family members who live far away. You can see our happy faces. (I'm taking the picture so you can't see my face.)
From the back, you can see what we were looking at. We have been able to hook up our computer to the tv and, thanks to wireless internet and Skype, we can have video calls to loved ones and Mom can see them. (We enjoy getting to see the detail in such a big picture, too.) This particular call was with my brother in NY. Before this we spoke to my sister in PA. After this we spoke with my daughter in North Dakots, my sister in Alabama, my sister in California, my other daughter in Florida, and my daughter-in-law (Ammon's widow, now remarried to a great guy) in Ohio. 
Sometimes I reflect on how ungrateful I have been at times in my life. There are so many millions of people living now and in the past who have suffered so much through mortal life. I have never experienced the fear, deprivations, and chaos of war. I have never experienced the devastation of a tornado or earthquake or flood or fire. I live in an age of miraculous medical technology where we can now avoid so many horrible illnesses that used to cripple and even kill people, especially children. I have always lived in a house where I was out of the rain and snow, could adjust the temperature to what was desired, and always had a comfortable place to sit or sleep. Except for a short time while building our "underground house", I have always enjoyed indoor plumbing. I have access to modern transportation and technology. When I miss them so much I can't stand it, I can get on an airplane or climb in a car and go to them. I complain about loved ones being far away but I can pick up a phone or hook up a computer and talk to them just as if they were in the same room! I am trying to be better at "counting my blessings". It seems so easy to pine away for something to be different but I know I can be happier when I consider all that I already have. If I am busy wishing I were somewhere else, I can't enjoy where I am. It's like always wishing it were tomorrow prevents my enjoying today. So I am going to try harder to remember to notice what I like where I am right now.
Sometimes I reflect on how ungrateful I have been at times in my life. There are so many millions of people living now and in the past who have suffered so much through mortal life. I have never experienced the fear, deprivations, and chaos of war. I have never experienced the devastation of a tornado or earthquake or flood or fire. I live in an age of miraculous medical technology where we can now avoid so many horrible illnesses that used to cripple and even kill people, especially children. I have always lived in a house where I was out of the rain and snow, could adjust the temperature to what was desired, and always had a comfortable place to sit or sleep. Except for a short time while building our "underground house", I have always enjoyed indoor plumbing. I have access to modern transportation and technology. When I miss them so much I can't stand it, I can get on an airplane or climb in a car and go to them. I complain about loved ones being far away but I can pick up a phone or hook up a computer and talk to them just as if they were in the same room! I am trying to be better at "counting my blessings". It seems so easy to pine away for something to be different but I know I can be happier when I consider all that I already have. If I am busy wishing I were somewhere else, I can't enjoy where I am. It's like always wishing it were tomorrow prevents my enjoying today. So I am going to try harder to remember to notice what I like where I am right now.
Sunday, May 01, 2011
And the truth shall make you free.....
As I read Christ's words in John 8 today, I began to think about what ways truth can "make you free". I have always been grateful to live in a country and in an age of the world when we are not hemmed in by ignorance. It is so limiting when you don't know how anything works or what there is in the world. You may as well be stuck in a playpen like a little child. It's wonderful that I don't have to cower in fear if I break a mirror thinking that I will now have 7 years of bad luck. It's wonderful that I never had to watch my children suffer through various "ordinary" childhood problems like ear infections without antibiotics or high fevers without aspirin/acetominophen/ibuprofen or crippled feet without corrective surgery. It's wonderful that I don't fear people who look different from me, different skin color or eye shape or size. I am aware that there are people in the world who are very different from me in appearance as well as traditions and lifestyles, and that's okay. I don't have to be afraid when the sun or moon darkens because I have been taught about eclipses. When you have a greater understanding of how things work, you have a better idea what to expect and maybe even how to change something if it doesn't work. When Christ taught about truth making them free, there were many who had "ears but could not hear". They thought he was talking about slavery or a free government. There is a truth available to all human beings that too many people who have ears, don't hear. God exists. Jesus Christ was not just a nice man and a charismatic teacher. He wanted people to understand that if they could just learn about Him, His Father, and His plan of happiness, they could be free. We CAN be free- to hope despite the hopelessnes in the world, to be the kind of people we want to be despite environments or influences around us, to love others even if they may not show us much love. We can be free from fear despite crimes, terrorists, diseases, and natural disasters. The freedom and rest that is offered to us is not the lazy laying around on clouds, playing harps, and eating grapes that is often pictured. Those who have ears and really WANT to hear and understand can do so. Our Father in Heaven and our Savior want us to be free and they want us to have rest. The freedom and rest are not from labor, which is a wonderful way to feel validated in our very existence. When we serve other people, accomplish good things, clean up our yards and houses- we feel a sense of having justified whatever air we breathe or space we take up. The freedom and rest offered us is a deeper, more long-lasting state of happiness as we know we are loved. We know we have a Father who is far wiser than we are and has promised to share with us "all that He has". We won't need money because we won't need to buy anything. We won't need to be stingy or greedy because there will be nothing that is not available to us. We don't need to fear because He is aware of us and what we need. If He clothed the lilies of the field and fed the sparrows of the air, how much more will He give to us, His children. We don't need to fear because if Christ was able to suffer through incomprehensible suffering then give up His life and be resurrected, we can suffer our minor afflictions, thank Him for His gift, and go on in resurrection, too. Isn't it wonderful to be free?!
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Family
Our recent whirlwind trip through many states included a stop near Houston, staying with Russ's brother and wife. We managed to get a picture of Russ with his mother and brother and sister. Families are still family even if we get together rarely and live miles apart. There is just a comfortable feeling being with people who could shut you out but usually you know they never would. I guess there are families in the world where members don't accept each other unconditionally and sometimes go for great lengths of time without communication, sometimes even to the grave. How sad.
The circumstance for me being with my sisters recently was not the happiest, but we still enjoyed being together. I am eternally grateful to have had the blessing of being a part of a loving, caring, helpful family through my earthly sojourn. I can only hope they will choose to be my family forever.
The fact that I want them to be with me forever will not make it happen, though. Each individual has been given, by our Father in Heaven, the right and responsibility to choose where they want to spend eternity. If we choose to accept the incredible gift of Christ's atonement and have a desire to be like Him and follow all the celestial rules to be worthy of citizenship in His kingdom, we have the possibility of being with our loved ones forever. But that will only happen if each one of them makes the same choice and effort. I hope for that.
The fact that I want them to be with me forever will not make it happen, though. Each individual has been given, by our Father in Heaven, the right and responsibility to choose where they want to spend eternity. If we choose to accept the incredible gift of Christ's atonement and have a desire to be like Him and follow all the celestial rules to be worthy of citizenship in His kingdom, we have the possibility of being with our loved ones forever. But that will only happen if each one of them makes the same choice and effort. I hope for that.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)