I recently had a conversation reminiscent of one I had over 40 years ago, only this time I was on the other side. I grew up with a vague awareness of, but definite belief in the existence of God. In my late teens and early 20's I came in contact with people who had a greater faith than mine. They had "given their life to God and Christ" and encouraged me to do likewise. I was okay with just admitting a belief in God and a gratitude for the Savior's atonement. I hesitated at the thought of "giving" my life- my dreams, plans, and actions- away to ANYONE. I struggled for awhile with that concept. I'm not sure exactly when I came to the decision but I recognized that God was not there just for my occasional whim or desperation. I needed to trust Him, not just when I thought He could give me what I wanted, but all the time.
So in this more recent conversation, I was asked something like, "Doesn't it bother you to think that you won't ever be able to do anything YOU want without having to get divine permission?" The person asking me had a similar perspective to what I had so many years ago, namely that if I were to give away my will or allow my will to be "swallowed up" in the will of God, I would lose my individuality. I wish I could explain to everyone who feels this way why it just doesn't work like that. God's greatest gift to us is our freedom to choose. His greatest desire is that we will choose Him. He wants us to be obedient, not because he wants to be able to boss us around. We are not indentured slaves to serve at the whim of a fickle master. He wants to give us ALL that He has and that is way more than diamonds or gold. He has greater power, wisdom, and knowledge than all of us puny humans put together. Despite that, we are His children and He loves us enough that He has declared that we are His work and His glory. His hope is that we will all choose to give Him the only thing we actually own independent of Him- our will. He could vaporize our homes, families, belongings, and even take away the air we breathe, or allow someone else to exercise their agency to do that. He has had to watch His children abuse, bully, murder, and hurt each other in monstrous ways. But He will never take away our will or our freedom to choose. He was so determined to allow us to choose for ourselves that He planned, knowing we would mess up a lot, to provide a way for the debts we would pile up beyond our ability to take care of, to be paid..... by someone also greater than we are- His Only Begotten Son. I can't believe that mighty as God is, He didn't weep to watch the abuse and suffering of His Perfect Son who never did anything to deserve the treatment He got. And to think, all that was for all of us- imperfect, disobedient, rebellious, self-centered, and bratty as we are. He is just waiting for us to finally repent, to finally realize that we are all those obnoxious things and start trying to listen and learn from Him. We are His children- made in His image. We are God's apprentices. He wants us to learn from Him to be like Him. He is just waiting for us to fill out the job application which includes (1) Faith in the Lord Jesus Christ (acceptance of His atonement) , (2) Repentance (this is deep, heartfelt, genuine sorrow for all we do or say that is un-Godlike coupled with a sincere intent to avoid doing the same again), (3)Baptism by immersion for the remission of sins (this is how we make our apprenticeship covenant and the great thing about it is that it allows us to start with a clean slate!), (4) Laying on of hands for the gift of the Holy Ghost (He gives us a gift that we can have with us all the time to guide us in everything we say and do so we can learn and improve). That's it. That's all we have to do. He will give us ALL that we have in exchange for our giving Him all that we have that is truly ours- a contrite heart and a willing spirit. I think it's a pretty good deal.
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