Balancing act

     At the end of life, each of us will die separately and feel accountable separately for how we spent our mortal years. Throughout our life we may "join" groups like Scouts, PTA, church groups, armed forces, work groups, unions, or even more casual book clubs or bowling teams. We are separate from each other but "no man is an island, no man stands alone" as the song goes. The challenge can sometimes be for us to balance time with groups or alone. Fathers who spend too much time with work and social groups will lose the relationship of their wife and children. Mothers who spend too much time with their children will lose the opportunity to nourishing friendships or the continued growth of intimacy with their husband. Time spent alone can be relaxing and refreshing but spending too much time alone makes it more difficult to know how to relate to other people.
     For those who have made the decision to become a follower of Christ, made baptismal covenants and keep them, there is still a constant need to balance group and personal activities. I am troubled by the potential hazards of personal electronic devices. It's wonderful that we can access words of prophets or church calendars on them. But it's a continuing temptation to avoid social media or other distractions when sitting in church meetings with a phone or other device. Even if the chosen activity is "good", like reading scriptures or conference talks, doing family history, or writing in journals, it can be detrimental to use an electronic device too much during meetings. How can a group be unified spiritually if there is a talk or lesson (that someone worked hard to prepare) being given to a roomful of people who are all reading or doing something else, even if they're quiet? It's one thing for young children to have "quiet books" to occupy them during meetings. Often the things said or taught are not easily understood by young children. But once a child is old enough to sit still and listen, it should be expected. A teenager or older playing games on their phone is just not cool during church meetings. It's not quite the same thing as "multi-tasking" because the goal in striving for the guidance of the Holy Ghost is that you focus on hearing the still, small voice- not just to accomplish finding out the gist of the message (What was the lesson/talk about??) while checking on upcoming activities or preparing your own talk or lesson to be given later. It's being alone in a crowd.
     On the other hand, there are those who rely totally on their church meetings to learn what's in the scriptures. There are those who may join family, companion, or group prayers but rarely, if ever, communicate directly with God themselves. Our relationship with God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Ghost is an individual, personal thing. I have long had the idea of writing a spiritual-type song with the lyrics beginning "You can't get to heaven on your brother's coat tails. You gotta get there by yourself." It's not appropriate nor will it be effective to develop a relationship with our Father by simply sitting in on a group session. Even in the temple, where we do most things as a group, our individual focus is still a personal thing. The scriptures say that when Jesus comes we will know Him but we can't know Him if we don't make the individual effort.
     It's just another principle to learn- another step in gaining wisdom or spiritual maturity. I guess it matters what your goal is. What is going to matter to you on your death bed? Once we figure that out, we need to work our way back to where we are right now and use it to guide us in the use of our time and efforts.